Hear me read this post on the Deep Sy podcast.
The Parable of Jake
Imagine a funeral. A man gets up to eulogize his father, Jake. He says his dad was a good man, beloved by his family and community. The mourners cry and laugh at stories reminding them of Jake’s multifaceted character, his trials and accomplishments, his hobbies and passions.
Then someone from the crowd yells out:
“Hey, remember when that scammer got all Jake’s money?!” The yeller is chuckling.
The son looks pained and taken aback.
“Yeah,” says the yeller, still laughing. “A guy called and said he was from the ‘American Bank of the USA’ and needed your dad’s bank info, and Jake gave it all to him!”
“Uh, okay, let me finish the eulogy. We aren’t looking for stories from the crowd,” says the son.
“He lost like all your inheritance!!!” screams the yeller, now slapping his knees.
“Sir, everyone here is quite sad and that’s a painful memory—”
“I’ve been making memes about it,” shouts the yeller.
“What?”
“Yeah, they’re doing really well online. A lot of people know your dad now.”
“I, I think you should leave.”
“For a lot of people, Jake basically means gullible twit,” continues the yeller, unabated. “It’s like his whole legacy for most people.”
“That’s horrifying,” says the son.
“Merriam-Webster reached out this morning. They’re going to add ‘Jake’ as a noun that means ‘dupe, especially one who loses his family’s wealth to a particularly obvious or untalented swindler.’”
